Just a couple'a god-fearin missionaries.
Well, firstly, a hearty apology to diehard Freb fans. The editorial staff here has been on assignment in Texas since the New Year, and unfortunately, that assignment did not involve the beatdown Ole Miss put on Ta Tech in Dallas. We'll certainly post more about that win as we've got some time to kill before baseball -- this basketball season promises to be devoid of anything worthy of writing about. In the meantime:
Yea, verily I say unto thee, the Arch-Angel hath decided to hover in Gaineslehem for next season. Let us all bow our heads.
In a rational sense, this is undeniably good news for Ole Miss. We just wrapped up our home and home with Florida from the east (that turned out ok, I guess), and will be trading them with a very dilapidated Tennessee team next season. So we won't have to see Tebow, unless of course we meet in Atlanta. What's even better is that Arkansas, LSU and Mississippi State will have to take on the reigning BCS Champs during the regular season in 2009. Ergo, a very literal + 1 to Ole Miss's already frighteningly optimistic 2009 SEC West championship campaign. Yay.
But, dear readers, Tebow's announcement means another otherwise joyful football season will be tainted by the media's worship of Tim Tebow. The staff of Frebs was forced to listen to the Nat'l Championship game on ESPN radio, and Kirk Herbstriet's man-crush on Timmy made us blush more than once. On Florida's second TD drive (one dominated by Percy Harvin - you know, the best player on Florida's team) Herbstreit said he thought Urban Meyer had abandoned the no-huddle offense so the rest of the players could see "the fire in Tebow's eyes" in the huddle. He honestly believed that. The staff of Frebs promptly pulled over and vomited on the north-bound shoulder of I-55 at mile marker 62 in the Missouri bootheel.
Also, for the record: exactly what is special or necessary about jumping to throw the football at the goal line? Did the linemen all of a sudden get taller, such that you have to jump above them when you're near the goal line? If television color-guys didn't inexplicably reach orgasm everytime that play happens, do you think Tim would still do the "jump pass"? And finally, is there a man among us who can't hit a wide open receiver from five yards away while jumping? I'm not saying that we're all as talented as Tim Tebow. I'm just saying that announcers going ape-shit over Tim Tebow doing the "jump pass" is silly because the "jump pass" is about as difficult as a free-throw. You don't hear Dick Vitale having an orgasm into the microphone every time Tyler Hansbrough hits a free-throw, do you?
Is this how I do it, Tim? Tee-hee!
Anyhoo, thanks for continuing to check in on Forward Rebels during this lull in posting. Your patience deserves rewarding, and Tebow's ladyfriend* is happy to oblige.
*probably not Tim Tebow's girlfriend, but whatev.
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