Guess You Won't be Needing these Alarm Clocks or Pillows...

Bling

Frebs has a good friend who is married to the daughter of a recently unemployed assistant coach at Auburn (contacts, a good blog must have contacts). He's a pretty good guy. A fan of Ole Miss, but contractually bound to pull for Auburn for the last few years. Nice as can be. Except for during bowl season, at which point he becomes insufferable.

For the past five years or so, said friend returns from whatever bowl Auburn has been to with a sack slung over his shoulder full of loot that these bowls heap on the participants and their families. You'll find serious bling in these gift packages. Jewelry. Expensive electronics. Nice clothing. The point is that players generally make out like bandits during bowl season, having found a nice little loop hole in that whole "NCAA athletes don't get paid" thing.

Now imagine, for a second, that you are Jason Cook. You have spent the last four years of your life busting your ass for Ole Miss, playing the least rewarding position on the field. Every year when you go home for Christmas, your smarmy brother is there, just smiling, with a new sack of loot he just got from whatever third-tier bowl South Carolina played in. You've waited your entire collegiate career to get that glib asshole back. Finally, in your senior season, your team is headed to one of the more prestigious bowls in the nation, and you just know you'll be the Fortunate Son at this year's family gathering. And then some asshole with a blog posts this report about what players get from each of the bowls this year. Ugh*:

2008 BOWL GIFTS TO PARTICIPANTS

New Mexico•

RCA video camcorder
Oakley Holeshot Three-Hand watch
Oakley beanie; New Era cap
Ogio travel bag, Oakley backpack
One-year ESPN The Magazine subscription

Pioneer Las Vegas•
Wii System bundle package
Oakley Holeshot Three-Hand watch
Oakley Hijinx sunglasses; hat


Sheraton Hawaii•
Kicker iKick500 iPod/iPhone dock
Kahala Aloha shirt, Oakley Hijinx sunglasses
Oakley backpack


Meineke Car Care•
Pure Digital Flip mini-camcorder
Fossil watch
Fossil sunglasses
Armor Gear backpack


Independence•

Timely Watch Co. watch
New Era cap
Trek mountain bike

Valero Alamo•
Sony 80-gigabyte PS3 system with game
Fossil watch

Pacific Life Holiday•

Insignia LCD 19-inch HDTV/DVD
Tourneau watch
Sport-Tek hooded sweatshirt
$45 Best Buy gift card

Brut Sun•

Sony DVD Handycam
Timely Watch Co. watch
Majestic fleece pullover, VP Sports cap
Armor Gear Dolly Llama luggage
Brut hair dryer

Insight •
Vizio 26-inch LCD HDTV
Bulova watch
Hat


Chick-fil-A •
Fossil watch
Two Russell hats
Russell travel bag
$300 Visa gift card; Chick-fil-A gift card

Konica Minolta Gator•
Bulova watch; Jostens ring
Oakley Split Thump MP3 sunglasses; fitted cap
Two-piece Mercury Luggage rolling duffel and sling bag


Rose Bowl presented by Citi •

Sony DVD camcorder
Fossil watch
Oakley sunglasses; New Era 59fifty hat
Ogio backpack
One-year ESPN The Magazine subscription

FedEx Orange •

Gifting suite; $300 in Sony Electronics^
Tourneau watch
New Era 59fifty hat; Crocs
Ogio backpack

AT&T Cotton•
Watch

AutoZone Liberty
Pure Digital Flip mini-camcorder
Fossil watch
Fossil sunglasses
Armor Gear backpack

Allstate Sugar•
Sony MP3 Walkman; Sony Blu-Ray player
Timely Watch Co. watch
New Era cap


Tostitos Fiesta•
Myvu personal media viewer; Apple iPod Nano
Kenneth Cole watch
Hat

FedEx BCS National Championship Game•
Gifting suite; $300 in Sony Electronics^
Tourneau watch
New Era 59fifty Hat; Crocs
Ogio duffle bag

* Chart was paired down for brevity's sake. The point is that even the most obscure bowls are seemingly giving out better gifts than the Cotton. Of course, for all we know, the watch is diamond encrusted or something. I would imagine its a fairly nice custom deal. But really, I'm not that far removed from being a college student myself, and I'd take the Alamo Bowl's gift package over our's in a heartbeat.